What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on
the bus
Trying to make his way home
— Joan Osborne Song
It is very easy to get wrapped up in the challenges and tests of the day. In the venture business, unfortunately, approximately 50% of investments end up in the losing column and 10% of the deals drive the superior returns (hopefully). As a result, you spend over 80% of your time dealing with the issues in the portfolio such as fundraising, hiring management, revisiting strategy and costs and such. When things go wrong, they go wrong very quickly and one company can take up most of your waking hours (and many of the other ones as well). These are not enjoyable times. This, however, is not the focus of this post. Perspective is.
Today, I spoke with our building’s former landlord, Dave. He is a wonderful person who treated the building, its employees and its tenants like family. Our head maintenance guy, Pedro, recently had a stroke. I was not aware of the full extent of it, except that he was not coming back to work and Dave had set up a public fund for him. Today, however, I heard the full story.
Pedro is 52 and has lost the use of portions of his left side including his arm. He is working hard in rehab to regain use, but it is an uphill battle and it is not certain how much he will succeed. It is a struggle for him to walk, but he tries to get out for a mile each day with a walker. He has three young children and wife to support. However, it is uncertain if he will be able to work again. Social security disability pays some and he has some savings set aside, but this all will eventually run down.
Pedro was an everyday part of many of our lives in the building. When he had his stroke, it was out of sight, out of mind for many of us. Dave was one of the only people to reach out to help Pedro. This is true compassion and true leadership. This is what people mean when they say that their company and employees are like a family. It means you legitimately care and you spend time and effort to take care of each other.
It made me think about how many people are around me everyday and, because I am so focused on my daily grind, my most recent troubled situation, I don’t look up and I don’t take the time to care. I also fail to put things into perspective. Stories like Pedro’s make me realize how truly fortunate I am to have my family, my job, my opportunities and my friends. It also makes me think about how I could be using all of these more effectively for the betterment of those around me, even if it is just one person at a time (starfish story to come later).
I don’t know how Pedro will make it through his harsh reality. I will do what I can to help Dave in his efforts. However, given how much Dave is doing, it makes me understand how much more engaged and helpful I could be. Not only is Dave helping Pedro, he (and people like him) are setting a bar for the rest of us. It is up to all of us to lift up our heads from the rat race and rise to the challenge.
Unfortunately, your friend is screwed. If he is lucky, he will recover enough to work. Otherwise, some people will toss a few coins his way, and after a year or so, he’ll be forgotten and living on whatever shit benefits he can get from SSI, which is not much.
My father ended up in a similar situation. Spinal tumor. He’ll be crippled and tortured to death, if he doesn’t kill himself first (what I’d do with the same diagnosis). He at least was fortunate enough to work for a union shop and has good health and retirement so he doesn’t have to worry about being bankrupted by his illness as many do.
If you want to do something to help Pedro, perhaps you and your colleagues could apply some thought to fixing this country’s medieval social services. I get tired of hearing people in Silicon Valley talk endlessly about meritocracy, when much of this industry rides on the backs of people who will never profit from it and by cutting corners whereever possible.
I am glad you at least are aware that people like Pedro keep your businesses running.
Matt,
Very nice story.
I think you got it right. It’s about perspective and awareness. Those who are not fully engaged in the world around them tend to disregard the rest of humanity in the world. Awareness of others and their humanity is the basis for love. When the Hero crosses the threshold on the way to his/her adventure, every person he/she encounters along the way has meaning.
Some people mean more than others, and those are the ones you become “engaged” with. But all of them have worth that adds to the journey. Even if the person brings a negative experience they still “add” value to the journey (hopefully in the form of something learned).
This recent episode in your journey highlights the value of Dave and Pedro in your adventure, perhaps a value that you did not recognize until now. This is the basis of remorse, not recognizing the value of something until it is gone.
Maybe an essential lesson here is to try to recognize value before the encounter. Take a simple example that you probably do once a day. Next time you go into a restaurant, thank your server before you even order. Ask their name, which identifies their humanity, tell them yours (make them aware of you) and tell them thank you for their time and effort in making your life more enjoyable (or something). See if you don’t get better service. And of course tip them well as you leave.
Keep this in mind when some entrepeneur comes to pitch you an idea. Think of the journey they have been on just to get to you. Thank them for meeting with you. See what happens. Remember, the hero has a thousand faces. 🙂
Thanks for taking the time to read this.
Mike
It is funny you should mention the Hero with a 1000 faces. Joseph Campbell is one of my favorite writers. I still recommend to friends the old PBS interview he did with Bill Moyer on the Power of Myth. For everyone else, Campbell was one of the leading mythologists in the world (prof at Sarah Lawrence) and generated amazing work comparing different religions and what their roll in society and future generations was. The journey of the hero is one of the classic “myths” or stories recounted over and over again across different religions. Star Wars was based on his work and the interview was actually shot at Lucas’s Skywalker Ranch. I know you can get the book and DVD still on Amazon for Power of Myth as well as at some Blockbusters (possibly Netflix).
My father-in-law is a master at doing just what you suggest. He was a very beloved member of Wall Street and made all of those around him, from waiters to traders, feel appreciated and acknowledged. I find it hard not to drop my head and focus on the firedrill of the day. Great advice.
Regarding Pedro, it shocks me to think how many other people are in his situation or worse (and how quickly fortunes change). I don’t know the answer, but the system needs fixing. Interesting enough, Blago’s Child Insurance program (Illinois now guarantees all children have coverage) is a godsend in situations like this.