I recently received an email asking "do we have our priorities aligned properly". While the email was a humor email (punchline below), the first half of it was illuminating in a more serious way. In all of our individual efforts to feel important and to be recognized (socially, in business circles, publications, in boardrooms, etc), we often fail to look at things from a long-term perspective.
We can often sacrifice those things that are important to us for near-term gain. I saw a great movie recently called Fearless (Jet Li’s "final" movie). While it has all of the action and fights we guys thrive on, it had a great message about life being about self-discipline and restraint and that blindly seeking victories, glory and followers often leads down a dark path.
The email above said:
In 1923, Who Was:
1. President of the largest steel company?
2. President of the largest gas company?
3. President of the New York Stock Exchange?
4. Greatest wheat speculator?
5. President of the Bank of International Settlement?
6. Great Bear of Wall Street?
These men were considered some of the worlds most successful of their days.
Now, 80 years later, the history book asks us if we know what ultimately became of them.
The Answers:
1. The president of the largest steel company.
Charles Schwab, died a pauper.
2. The president of the largest gas company,
Edward Hopson, went insane.
3. The president of the NYSE,
Richard Whitney, was released from prison to die at home.
4. The greatest wheat speculator,
Arthur Cooger, died abroad, penniless.
5. The president
of the Bank of International Settlement, shot himself.
6. The Great Bear of Wall Street,
Cosabee Livermore, also committed suicide.
Family, friends and what you contribute for the betterment of those around you is what, in the end, legacy is made of. You can usually get just as far up the corporate or entrepreneurial ranks by helping others advance as you can by stabbing your way up. Creates a kind of Karma piggy bank. Depends on your preferred style and beliefs.
The humorous part of the email (taking a little different tack than my ramblings above) followed:
However: in that same year, 1923, the PGA Champion and the winner of the most important golf tournament, the US Open, was Gene Sarazen.
What became of him?
He played golf until he was 92,
died in 1999 at the age of 95.
He was financially secure
at the time of his death.
The Moral:
#@&* work.
Play golf.
Whether tragic events touch your family personally or are brought into your home via newspapers and television, you can help children cope with the anxiety that violence, death, and disasters can cause.
Listening and talking to children about their concerns can reassure them that they will be safe. Start by encouraging them to discuss how they have been affected by what is happening around them. Even young children may have specific questions about tragedies. Children react to stress at their own developmental level.
The Caring for Every Child’s Mental Health Campaign offers these pointers for parents and other caregivers:
* Encourage children to ask questions. Listen to what they say. Provide comfort and assurance that address their specific fears. It’s okay to admit you can’t answer all of their questions.
* Talk on their level. Communicate with your children in a way they can understand. Don’t get too technical or complicated.
* Find out what frightens them. Encourage your children to talk about fears they may have. They may worry that someone will harm them at school or that someone will try to hurt you.
* Focus on the positive. Reinforce the fact that most people are kind and caring. Remind your child of the heroic actions taken by ordinary people to help victims of tragedy.
* Pay attention. Your children’s play and drawings may give you a glimpse into their questions or concerns. Ask them to tell you what is going on in the game or the picture. It’s an opportunity to clarify any misconceptions, answer questions, and give reassurance.
* Develop a plan. Establish a family emergency plan for the future, such as a meeting place where everyone should gather if something unexpected happens in your family or neighborhood. It can help you and your children feel safer.
If you are concerned about your child’s reaction to stress or trauma, call your physician or a community mental health center.
It is amazing what children notice or witness. When 9/11 hit, I did not think one of our children who was you was seeing anything on the TV or papers, but had a terrified reaction when a fireman came to class for fire week, thinking that it was the firemen (not the planes) that made the towers fall down. Never underestimate them…